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Egg donation, a gift of life

By Susan Newham

What would you do if you found out that your eggs were no longer viable and you couldn’t conceive a baby? Would you ‘adopt’ an egg from a donor? These days, it’s a very real way to have a baby.


Failed fertility treatment


“I remember when my doctor first told me how some women use other women’s eggs to fall pregnant. I thought, ‘Not me. I wouldn’t do that.’ But that was before my year of failed fertility treatments, which left me feeling depressed and hopeless,” says Amanda Cloete (names has been changed). Amanda always knew she would want children but, after getting married and divorced, she met her second husband when she was already 37. “Luckily, he was as keen to have children as I was so we started trying immediately,” says Amanda. After 10 months with no pregnancy, they decided to visit a fertility clinic. “I was told that although my husband’s sperm was fine, I wasn’t ovulating properly. I remember feeling numb.”

What followed was a year of unsuccessful fertility treatments, including one miscarriage. Amanda recalls, “It was after the miscarriage and finding out that my sister was pregnant with her second child and listening to my doctor kindly telling me that because I was nearing 40 the quality of my eggs wasn’t great, I began to look at the only other available option – egg donation.”

It wasn’t an easy decision. “My husband and I spent hours talking about it. Although adoption was a possibility, I really wanted the experience of being pregnant and giving birth. I also felt guilty about not being able to give my husband his own biological child, although he reassured me he would support whatever decision I made. We read everything we could find over the Net and also spoke to friends and family. Six months later, after much soul searching, we decided to give it a go.”

The first step was choosing an egg donor. “There really weren’t that many choices because very few women donate eggs. But there was one donor who was a good match for me physically. I liked the look of her baby picture and she seemed to have a good medical record. Once we finally decided on the donor, I finally started feeling excited again. We were going to have a baby!”

What followed was a series of medical procedures, which included the doctors at the clinic obtaining eggs from the donor. Although a number of eggs were extracted and fertilised with Amanda’s husband’s sperm, only two embryos were inserted into Amanda’s uterus. The rest were frozen for possible future use. Amanda remembers the day of the insertion: “My husband and I were like two schoolchildren, nervous and giggly. But the procedure was almost a non-event that happened very quickly on the gynae examination table. I felt like I was just going in for a pap smear.” A speculum was inserted vaginally and the embryos deposited into Amanda’s uterus. Amanda was told to wait two weeks before doing a pregnancy test.

“After so many failures, you build a protective resistance to thinking you’ll ever be pregnant,” says Amanda. “I almost didn’t want to take the pregnancy test but my husband urged me to… and I was pregnant! I couldn’t believe it had been that easy. “Egg donation has a 20 per cent chance of producing twins because of the number of embryos put back, and I had mixed feelings about that. But when I went back to the clinic I was pregnant with one baby.”

Amanda’s daughter is now 18 months old. “Before she was born, I worried that I wouldn’t feel like she was my child because she wasn’t biologically related to me. But now I can’t imagine loving or cherishing anyone more. I do think about the donor from time to time but mostly I feel that she must be an amazing woman for giving us this extraordinary gift of life.”


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Jenny

2009-08-24 00:03

Another reputable egg donor agency that has been in existence since 2007 facilitated hundreds of egg donation programmes and egg donor treatments, offering professional egg donor services is:
baby2mom Egg Donation and Surrogacy Programme
Tel 084 465 8353
Website: www.baby2mom.co.za




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